idiot teachers.

so i seem to have had a really bad day today. first period i had legal studies and i had an outcome, which went really well, but we got our marks back from the last outcome and i got 40%! which means a re-submission is required. i failed because of lack of detail. it was expected, so it wasn't that bad, but i've redone it and i'm going to hand it in as a draft tomorrow just to be on the safe side. but my teacher kept me in for the entire recess, which sucked because i didn't get to eat so i had to resort to eating in math class in period 2.

then period 3 came along...i had religion & society. my teacher is a priest who is probably the least priest-like person you'll ever meet. he's rude and constantly tell me and my 2 friends in that class that he hates us. so i had an outcome due today in r&s, it was on personal religious experience (something that i'm very passionate about) and it came out to be 4,398 words...yup. my teacher didn't accept this. i've cut it down to 1,850 words, but i can't do anything more than that, but my teacher won't accept that either. on the criteria sheet it said minimum 1,200 words, but kids in my class were doing 1,300 words and he was still saying that it was too much. HE DIDN'T FREAKING SPECIFY ANY MAXIMUM WORD LIMIT HOW WAS I MEANT TO KNOW?! he's basically asking for exactly 1,200 words. i can't possibly do that, so i've just re-submitted it as 1,850 words. i literally tried so hard and put so much effort into that, and then i'm told i have to remove 1/3 of it. his reason for not wanting more than 1,200 words was because he can't be bothered reading them all. YOU'RE A TEACHER IT'S YOUR JOB!!! but apparently he's a taxi driver on the weekends too...and an ex-cia member...priest, teacher, taxi driver, cia...hmm

so basically today i failed one outcome because of too little detail, and i failed another because of too much detail. my r&s teacher is a little idiot.

earliest memory?

i've been researching, and everything says that you can't develop a long-term memory before the age of 3. but i can remember from 18 months, when my brother was born. i remember standing at my mum's hospital bed, and she gave me a new baby doll, and i was feeding it with a bottle. my 2 aunts and nan were also there.

i have 4 memories before i turned 3. the first one was when my brother was born, the second one was a computer screensaver which was a monkey, the third one was taking my aunt to the airport when she moved to england, and the fourth one was when we were on a holiday in yarrawonga and i was decorating and holding up a poster that said "we miss you julie! [my aunt]" and getting my photo taken with it to send to her in england.

but i've also heard that you don't remember things from that original time, but when you remember something, you're remembering the last time you remembered that thing. so was that just something i thought about often?

trust issues.

i've always had trust issues. i've never really become "attached" to another person. i don't honestly consider people friends. i don't think any of my "friends" like me, they probably don't - better safe than sorry. i'd rather sit in my bedroom alone all day instead of going to the movies with people, because i know i'll just be a burden. i know i annoy everyone, and i know i can't help it. i'd never trust somebody to keep a secret. i'd never trust somebody to not talk about me behind my back.

i wonder if i'll ever find a person who i can actually call a friend?