idiot teachers.

so i seem to have had a really bad day today. first period i had legal studies and i had an outcome, which went really well, but we got our marks back from the last outcome and i got 40%! which means a re-submission is required. i failed because of lack of detail. it was expected, so it wasn't that bad, but i've redone it and i'm going to hand it in as a draft tomorrow just to be on the safe side. but my teacher kept me in for the entire recess, which sucked because i didn't get to eat so i had to resort to eating in math class in period 2.

then period 3 came along...i had religion & society. my teacher is a priest who is probably the least priest-like person you'll ever meet. he's rude and constantly tell me and my 2 friends in that class that he hates us. so i had an outcome due today in r&s, it was on personal religious experience (something that i'm very passionate about) and it came out to be 4,398 words...yup. my teacher didn't accept this. i've cut it down to 1,850 words, but i can't do anything more than that, but my teacher won't accept that either. on the criteria sheet it said minimum 1,200 words, but kids in my class were doing 1,300 words and he was still saying that it was too much. HE DIDN'T FREAKING SPECIFY ANY MAXIMUM WORD LIMIT HOW WAS I MEANT TO KNOW?! he's basically asking for exactly 1,200 words. i can't possibly do that, so i've just re-submitted it as 1,850 words. i literally tried so hard and put so much effort into that, and then i'm told i have to remove 1/3 of it. his reason for not wanting more than 1,200 words was because he can't be bothered reading them all. YOU'RE A TEACHER IT'S YOUR JOB!!! but apparently he's a taxi driver on the weekends too...and an ex-cia member...priest, teacher, taxi driver, cia...hmm

so basically today i failed one outcome because of too little detail, and i failed another because of too much detail. my r&s teacher is a little idiot.

saint dymphna

so, quick post before i go to school.

i have this necklace of saint dymphna, she's the patron saint of those with mental illness (and i seem to have a bit of that). i always take it off at night because it bothers be when i lay down, and in the morning i [usually] put it back on.

awkward photo of me because i don't [usually] take photos of me!

there have been a few odd occasions where i've forgotten to put it on. when i have panic or anxiety attacks,
or i feel like i'm about to go into a [psychotic] fit, i'll hold the necklace and pray to her. but when i don't wear the necklace, it's terrible. i feel almost like i'm going to die.

most people i talk to think i'm just obsessive and i'm having another panic attack because i'm not wearing something that i always wear. but i believe it's her and the lord comforting me.

i've been struggling with faith for over a year now, though i haven't stopped fully believing, it sucks. but there are just little things that give me just a little more proof that christ is standing right next to me.